Wednesday, June 25, 2014

Life’s Lesson:

Life’s Lesson: Mastering The Art Of Patience

Mastering The Art Of Patience ...........

 A study found that women are the angrier lot in comparison to men when driving on the road. Naturally, not many people agree. But if truth be told, our patience often get tested whether when we're driving or not.

Personality clashes are expected, as no one person is alike. Heck, even our parents or siblings drive us up the wall from time to time. Patience is one of those virtues that is admirable, but oh-so-hard to follow through. It's a combination of calmness and understanding that is unfortunately lost on many of us today. Getting frustrated, stressed and angry seems to be the norm.

But just as how you get over-emotional about a situation or another person, you can also easily transform yourself to be a calm, rational human being. The key here is willpower and adjusting certain behaviours, in five steps:

Step 1: Don't say a word

When we're faced with someone that annoys us, the instant reaction is to put up a shield. Whether to protect or simply to extricate ourselves from the person/ situation, we are more likely to react negatively.

Here's what you should remember, when you are ruled by your feelings, you can't think and speak at the same time. And thus, you might just spew words that you'll likely regret later. So give your mind time to process what is going on and only say a thing or two to get some frustrations out. This will be the start to developing greater tolerance, even towards idiots.

Step 2: The problem is you

Yes, we all would like to shift the blame on someone else for making us feel this way but the reality is we are responsible for how we feel. We control our own actions and responses. Another person can't make you feel angry, frustrated or upset without you allowing it to happen.

This will be the toughest thing to acknowledge but if you can keep the focus on yourself, then you'll know you're in the driver's seat. Also know that you can't change or control another person, some are just negative people. So if they are the problem, the operative manual here is to let them be, don't get caught up in their world.

Step 3: Question yourself

What is making you so upset? What is it about the situation or person that is sending you over the edge? You have to find the cause to you feeling annoyed and impatient.

It could be that that someone reminds you of another person you're not particularly fond of; or maybe you're rushing for time and it feels like you're not getting things done like how you'd want to; or perhaps, you're actually stressed out about something else completely. Only when you can give a name to what's bothering you, would you be able to deal with it.

Step 4: Find a way out

When you are able to identify the real cause of your frustration or lack of patience, you can now look for ways to relieve the stress and anxiety.

If it's driving that is causing you to go mad, prepare a ‘survival kit' before going into the car. Get your favourite playlist ready, or try one of these yoga moves when stuck in traffic. Yes it is possible to do simple yoga in the car! The key is to distract yourself from the negative feeling and make the situation favourable for you.

Step 5: Don't lose perspective

Even in the best of efforts, our emotions can still get the best of us. While you may be able to stick to the previous four steps, you might feel short-changed and lose your cool. That's alright! Feel what you have to but keep your perspective.

Figure out if this is really an issue worth putting so much energy into. If the answer is no, then let it go. If the answer is yes, pull out from the emotion and put some thought into how best to deal with the situation without it blowing up in your face. Patience is a virtue indeed.

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