A study found that women are the angrier lot in
comparison to men when driving on the road. Naturally, not many people
agree. But if truth be told, our patience often get tested whether when
we're driving or not.
Personality clashes are expected, as no one person is alike. Heck, even
our parents or siblings drive us up the wall from time to time. Patience
is one of those virtues that is admirable, but oh-so-hard to follow
through. It's a combination of calmness and understanding that is
unfortunately lost on many of us today. Getting frustrated, stressed and
angry seems to be the norm.
But just as how you get over-emotional about a situation or another
person, you can also easily transform yourself to be a calm, rational
human being. The key here is willpower and adjusting certain behaviours,
in five steps:
Step 1: Don't say a word
When we're faced with someone that annoys us, the instant reaction is to
put up a shield. Whether to protect or simply to extricate ourselves
from the person/ situation, we are more likely to react negatively.
Here's what you should remember, when you are ruled by your feelings,
you can't think and speak at the same time. And thus, you might just
spew words that you'll likely regret later. So give your mind time to
process what is going on and only say a thing or two to get some
frustrations out. This will be the start to developing greater
tolerance, even towards idiots.
Step 2: The problem is you
Yes, we all would like to shift the blame on someone else for making us
feel this way but the reality is we are responsible for how we feel. We
control our own actions and responses. Another person can't make you
feel angry, frustrated or upset without you allowing it to happen.
This will be the toughest thing to acknowledge but if you can keep the
focus on yourself, then you'll know you're in the driver's seat. Also
know that you can't change or control another person, some are just
negative people. So if they are the problem, the operative manual here
is to let them be, don't get caught up in their world.
Step 3: Question yourself
What is making you so upset? What is it about the situation or person
that is sending you over the edge? You have to find the cause to you
feeling annoyed and impatient.
It could be that that someone reminds you of another person you're not
particularly fond of; or maybe you're rushing for time and it feels like
you're not getting things done like how you'd want to; or perhaps,
you're actually stressed out about something else completely. Only when
you can give a name to what's bothering you, would you be able to deal
with it.
Step 4: Find a way out
When you are able to identify the real cause of your frustration or lack
of patience, you can now look for ways to relieve the stress and
anxiety.
If it's driving that is causing you to go mad, prepare a ‘survival kit'
before going into the car. Get your favourite playlist ready, or try one
of these yoga moves when stuck in traffic. Yes it is possible to do
simple yoga in the car! The key is to distract yourself from the
negative feeling and make the situation favourable for you.
Step 5: Don't lose perspective
Even in the best of efforts, our emotions can still get the best of us.
While you may be able to stick to the previous four steps, you might
feel short-changed and lose your cool. That's alright! Feel what you
have to but keep your perspective.
Figure out if this is really an issue worth putting so much energy into.
If the answer is no, then let it go. If the answer is yes, pull out
from the emotion and put some thought into how best to deal with the
situation without it blowing up in your face. Patience is a virtue
indeed.
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