Wednesday, December 28, 2011

~ Enriching Thoughts ~

The highest aim in life - To know God and do His will

The most enriching good habit - Complimenting others

The most destructive bad habit - Worry

The greatest joy - Giving

The greatest loss - Loss of self-respect

The most satisfying work - Helping others

The ugliest personality trait - Selfishness

The most endangered species - Dedicated leaders

Our greatest natural resource - Our youth

The ugliest look - A frown

The greatest "shot in the arm" - Encouragement

The greatest problem to overcome - Fear

The most effective sleeping pill - Peace of mind

The most crippling failure disease - Excuses

The most powerful forces in life - Love

The most dangerous piranha - A gossiper

The Greatest Life-Giver - The Creator

The worlds most incredible computer - The brain

The worst thing to be without - Hope

The deadliest weapon - The tongue

The two most power-filled words - "I Can"

The greatest asset - Faith

The most worthless emotion - Self-pity

The most beautiful attire - A SMILE!

The most prized possession - Self esteem

The most powerful channel of communication - Prayer

The most contagious spirit - Enthusiasm

~ A Heart Full Of Love ~

~ A Heart Full Of Love ~

* Anyone who is willing to listen can hear what is being said, even if no words are being spoken.

* Just how high can the human heart rise, in a world so full of uncaring eyes. Where animals suffer and children die and people fight wars without even knowing why. Where alcohol and drugs cause wasted lives, and shelters are full of unwed mothers and battered wives.

But should the day come that man learns to care,and wants to no longer just take, but also to share. And he learns that everything has the right to live, and life is not something he can take, but can not give. When he learns to approach life with a heart full of love, for everything on earth and in the heavens above. When he learns to do these things he will have opened the door, to knowing just how high, the human heart can soar.

* I've been touched by the morning sun that chases the night away, and I've been touched by the gentle words that love-struck poets say. And I've been touched by the morning mist everyone calls the dew, but it all seems more beautiful now that I've been touched by you.

* The pain we feel when someone leaves our life is in direct proportion to the joy they bring while a part of our life.

* In every relationship there is a chance of getting hurt, but once we've known the joy of holding another close, we realize thats a chance we just have to take.

* We should do everything within reason to save a good relationship. But if we are constantly trying to save it, it's probably not a good relationship.

* When you truly know the meaning of the word love, you will also know the meaning of the word pain.

* I've often wondered and racked my brain, but I guess I'll never know, why one person looks and sees the rain, while another is seeing a rainbow.

* In our language we have two words; solitude and loneliness. Solitude is being alone, without thinking about being alone.
While loneliness is being alone, and being aware that your alone.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

~ Life Is All Just But A Game ~

Myspace Life Graphics Quotes

We have always been told not to treat life as a game and that we have to be serious about it. Yes, I totally agree on that but agreeing that we should be serious in our game. There is nothing wrong with treating life as a game as long as you play it seriously. In fact if you were to give it some serious thoughts, life can indeed be just like a game. Perhaps, let us define what makes a game, a game.

I should believe that you have personally played before, a variety of different games? Some would have been fun and amusing while some boring. But be they however entertaining or not, all the games you have played eventually lead to an ending didn't they? It was an either win or loses, or maybe even a draw for some. That's life! Just as like a game, all our actions in life will lead to a certain outcome too. I should believe that you have heard of the saying, you can either be a winner or a loser in life? And I am sure you would want to be a winner in life?

Now, what matters is how you are going to play this game of yours, your very own game of life. And for your information, your game has already begun. What is the key to winning a game? The key to winning a game is always to understand the objective of the game well. It is only when you are clear about the objective will you know how to go about playing the game?

And what should the objective of your game be? It is for you to decide. Remember. This is yours very own game, your very own life. Before this game can proceed, you have to first get your objective right, knowing clearly what you want for yourself in life. There is not point rushing into the game. Without a clear objective, you will probably end up wasting your precious time losing the very whole game. Lay down your objectives first and then you are ready to start your game. Next, would be to work out some wise strategies.

First: Get to understand the strength of you, yourself (the key player) Now, everyone is bound to be strong and weak in certain areas. Ask yourself what are you good in and what are you weak in? Attack the game in those areas you are strong in and avoid those where you are weak at.

Second: Build up a strong ally or team. In this game, you are bound to meet many other different players. And remember, some are there to help you while some are there to harm and to put you down. Choose wisely the partners who can help you, especially in the areas you are weak in. Your unique strengths plus theirs will make up the whole and together this will be a strong team. To form a soccer team, you will need at least eleven players each with their specialty, isn't it? Understand this. You can never rule this world alone.

Third: Plan your attack. Once you get the foundation right, clearly knowing the strength and weakness of yourself and the players around you, plan your moves accordingly. Decide on a plan that best suits you and your fellow team players; a plan that is within the capability of everyone. No point having the best of plans when there is no one to execute it.

Finally: Take actions! Paper talk no matter how excellent the plan is won't get you anywhere without real physical actions.

Many have great ideas, some of which are indeed excellent but lack the drive and the courage to execute them; to put them into real actions. And why is this so? Because they are still unclear of their objectives in life. They didn't clearly understand themselves, failing to find out what they want in life.

Remember. In this game of life, there is never a predetermined ending. What will be the outcome of the game? Nobody knows. And in this game of life, there is never a fixed rule to how you are going to play it. But understand this. For all games that exist in this world, there is one ultimate rule: If you are not going to play, you can never win. That's life! If you never give yourself the chance to try, how will you ever know what will just come next? Without some real physical actions, you won't get anywhere in this game. In life, if you are not going to take any actions to work towards your objective, nothing will ever happen.

But as the word game imply, it mean winning is certainly achievable. Understand the game well, play it smartly and the chances of winning will be there. And remember. This game of life will only end when you decided to give up. Though you may fail at times during this game but this game of life is not going to end on you unless you give up on yourself. Remember. The law of Nature states that for all that exist in this world there is always the equal and opposite side to them. When there can be failure, there can also be victory too. Don't give up without even trying.

Monday, December 5, 2011

Give It Some Thoughts ~

Sometimes, in our relentless efforts to find the person we LoVe we fail to recognize and appreciate the people who LoVe us. We miss out on so many beautiful things simply because we allow ourselves to been slaved by our own selfish concerns. Go for the man of deeds not for the man of words , for you will find rewarding happiness not with the man you LoVe but the man who LoVes you more.

The best LoVers are those who are capable of LoVing from a distance, far enough to allow the other person to grow, but never too far to feel the LoVe deep within your being. To let go of someone doesn't mean you have to stop LoVing, it only means that you allow that person to find his own happiness without expecting him to come back.

Letting go is not just setting the other person free, but it is also setting yourself free from all bitterness, hatred, and anger that keep in your heart. Do not let the bitterness rare away your strength and weaken your faith and never allow pain to dishearten you ............ but rather let you grow with wisdom in bearing it.

You may found peace in just LoVing someone from a distance not expecting anything in return. But be careful, for this can sustain life but can never give enough room for us to grow. We can all survive with just beautiful memories of the past but real peace & happiness come only with open acceptance of what reality is today.

There comes a time in our lives when we chance upon someone so nice and beautiful and we just find ourselves getting so intensely attracted to that person. This feeling soon become a part of our everyday lives and eventually consumes our thoughts and actions The sad part of it is when we begin to realize that this person feels nothing more for us than just a friendship.

We start our desperate attempt to get noticed and be closer but in the end our efforts are still unrewarded and we end up being sorry for ourselves. You don't have to forget someone you LoVe What you need to learn is how to accept the verdict of reality without being bitter or sorry for yourself.

Believe me.... you would be better off giving that dedication and LoVe ... to someone more deserving. Don't let your heart run your life, be sensible and let your mind speak for itself. Listen not only to your feelings but to reason as well. Always remember that if you lose someone today, it means that someone better is coming tomorrow:

If you lose LoVe that doesn't mean that you failed in LoVe. Cry, if you have to, but make it sure that the tears wash away the hurt the bitterness that the past has left with you. Let go of yesterday ..... LoVe will find its way back to you ........... when it does, pray that it may be the LoVe ...... that will stay and last a lifetime. ...........

Friday, December 2, 2011

~ The Expression Of Love.......... ~

Love is a feeling that we experience in so many different ways toward various people. Love is the ultimate expression of our divinity. It is a way of showing tenderness to our children and passion to our lover. Love is an emotion that hold the power to heal and strengthen the physical and emotional body.

There have been times that I have expressed deep love and have been hurt. I have never regretted showing love, however, there is a certain level of expectation that it will be reciprocated by the beloved. I have also found love to be the foundation to allow relationships and people to blossom. Just spending time in nature brings me the feeling of overwhelming love and sacredness.

I think many of us feel safe showering our pets and children with love. At least the pets give it back to us with complete unconditionality. Our children go through phases where love is taken for granted. I often experience the overwhelming fullness of love for those that I care deeply about.

Once we allow our hearts to open and reveal the full expression of love it comes with great risk. We have hopes and expectations. We want it to be reciprocated and valued. When we choose to risk our hearts, we take a chance of being hurt or rejected. If we don't risk anything, what is the alternative? Remaining numb and safe.

Love has the power to heal, and, transform. Every expression of love carries in it the seeds of possibilities. When we nurture and honor love it has the ability to lift us up and give us hope, tenderness and affection. Without love we miss out on so much.

So why do we at times reject love? When an opportunity to give or receive love presents itself why do we shut down and hide? It seems that for many of us past experiences can hinder our ability to take a chance. Fear can envelop us to the point that it doesn't seem worth it to take the risk.

I know sometimes love comes with strings attached. It can be smothering, suffocating, controlling and needy. It can carry some all consuming fears if we have been hurt, betrayed, abandoned, rejected, or violated in the past. It can leave us rejecting the very idea of it's implications.

What about self love? Can we love ourselves unconditionally? Can we accept our own flaws and expect others to love us when we cannot love ourselves? What if we are not at our ideal weight? What if we have made mistakes? Can we forgive ourselves? Will others forgive us? What if we're not exactly where we want to be in our lives? Do we still deserve to give and receive love then?

What if we didn't receive the right kind of love from our parents or family? Can another person love us any better? Can we chance experiencing love when there holds the possibility that it may suddenly leave or be taken from us? If we haven't had healthy, safe, and secure love modeled for us we might not know what it should even look or be like.

Fear holds us back, when we are not living in the present moment as the full, unhindered expression of love. It can grow when it doesn't reference the past and how it once was. It can be experienced when it doesn't project into the future as to what it will be. Will love turn out exactly like we want it to? And if it doesn't, is it still worth feeling the love now?

If we can allow ourselves to love our partners, children, pets, parents and friends. If we can deeply and completely love and accept ourselves. If we can fully open our hearts to the full expression of love in all its beauty and forms, how do you think our lives will transform?

Sending you unconditional love and many blessings.....


Yaa Rabb .......

I have so much love in my heart. Sometimes I experience fear in expressing my feelings of love in fear of rejection and abandonment. Sometimes I fear expressing my feelings of love for fear that it won't turn out the way I want it to. Sometimes, God, I just fear. So I ask that all the fear may removed and transmuted. May only love remain.

There are those that I love that I don't know how to express and show my true love for. There are those that I feel love for that don't reciprocate my feelings. And then, gratefully, there are those giving and receiving love flows easily and naturally.

I accept all types of love. Unconditionally. I know that the expression of love is all that matters. On a higher level those who I send my love to, receive it. I feel the love returned to me ten-thousand fold.

So, God, I humble myself to you in this moment. I ask that you assist me in opening my heart to even greater levels. Show me how I can be a full expression of love in all ways, always. With pure intent....

And so it is.


Thursday, December 1, 2011

~ Know Yourself ~

Every one of us has strengths ... and weaknesses. Sometimes we have difficulty identifying our strengths, because we often feel calling out our good points is bragging, or we feel others might feel we're full of ourselves ... but nothing is further from the truth. It's only after you truly learn your own personal strengths that you can begin to understand the value you can offer to this world. Once you realize where your strengths lie, you'll be surprised how your self-esteem will be enhanced and the confidence you have in yourself will be noticed by others, who will seek out your opinions and learn to draw upon your strengths!

By the same token, it's important to know that we all have weaknesses ... and once you've determined YOURS, you'll be better able to set your own limits. Knowing your weaknesses will also allow you to develop your own personal growth plan, which can be an excellent opportunity to learn new things and take on new challenges.

Things happen for a reason. When you understand the why, you gain control and effectiveness. Knowing why, and why not, will help you to avoid mistakes, and to create powerful strategies for excellence in all you do.

The world is full of opportunities to create value and wealth – and these opportunities come disguised as problems. Any problem is an opportunity to make an improvement. Problems and obstacles force you to focus your efforts toward a specific goal – solving the problem. Problems are a blessing, because when you solve them you grow as a person and you gain valuable experience.

You learn things that can allow you to help other people solve the same problem. If the problem you solve is big enough and widespread enough, the opportunity that creates could be enormous. Challenges and problems give you a chance to develop your resourcefulness. Problems are your opportunity to give it all you’ve got – to truly shine as a person.

Don’t become defensive, but strive to see the other person’s point of view. Respect the fact that criticism is a form of caring. If someone didn’t care, they would just say nothing at all. Realize that any criticism of your action does not reflect negatively on you as a person. Objectively consider the criticism of others, and you can learn from it.

The need to be right, the need to be comfortable, the need to control others, the need for security, and the need to possess, among other things. These things are elusive. Don’t need what you have – have what you need. If always you think in terms of needing what you have, then you will never have enough. Instead, think in terms of having what you need and you will always enjoy abundance.

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

~ Delight ~

It is rewarding to find someone you like,
but it is essential to like yourself.

It is quickening to recognize that someone is a good and decent human being,
but it is indispensable to view yourself as acceptable.

It is a delight to discover people who are worthy of respect and admiration and love,
but it is vital to believe yourself deserving of these things.

For you cannot live in someone else.
You cannot find yourself in someone else.
You cannot be given a life by someone else.
Of all the people you will know in a lifetime,
you are the only one you will never leave or lose.

To the question of your life, you are the only answer.
To the problems of your life, you are the only solution.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

~ Finding Balance in Life ~

Finding balance in life is a realistic and important goal. However, sometimes there are glitches and life feels out of control. When this happens it's usually because you are not getting your needs met or you are not aligned with your values. When you're out of integrity life feels out of balance.

Balance is a feeling derived from being whole and complete; it's a sense of harmony. It is essential to maintaining quality in life and work. Your life is made up of many vital areas including your health, family, financial, intellectual, social, work, spiritual, recreation, personal growth, romance and more. You won't necessarily spend time every day in each area in equal amounts, but if in the long run, you spend a sufficient quantity and quality of time in each area, your life will feel in balance. However, if you neglect any one area, never mind two or three, you will eventually sabotage your own success. Much like a table, if one leg is longer or shorter than the rest, it will make the entire table wobbly. For instance, if you don't take care of your health, your family and social life will suffer; if you put too much time into running your business, personal relationships and self care may suffer.

Living a balanced life is about integrating those components of your life that are truly important to you and realizing that sometimes you need to make choices about what has to come first. Making choices is powerful and allows you to live a balanced life that's aligned with what you value. By choosing what comes first, sometimes there are sacrifices. But living a balanced life doesn't require you to give 100 percent of yourself 100 percent of the time. There will be times when personal/family life and work collide but by knowing what's most important to you and making choices based on this criterion, you'll be better able to balance your decisions and feel whole.

1. Focus on your priorities. Concentrate your time and energy on your personal and professional priorities. Be willing to say "no" to everything else. Identify your values and align your life around what's truly most important to you.

2. Get organized.
Create a structured plan each day rather than reacting to whatever comes up. Don't allow someone else's poor planning to become your emergency or priority. Plan ahead and anticipate your needs. Have back-up to handle your emergencies and a support network so that you are prepared with a contingency plan should the need arise. Arrange time in your schedule for other activities besides work so that your days are not only balanced, but rewarding.

3. Be flexible.
Accept that needs will pop up that will require your readjustment and perhaps new choices. Forgive yourself when things don't get done. Stop striving for perfection and allow for more reasonable standards.

4. Create daily routines.
Instill healthy habits into your daily life. Find ways to relax, relieve tension, and minimize stress. Allow time for self care by practicing daily journaling, meditation, exercise or some other form of quiet time just for you where you can go to reflect, plan, relax and envision your day ahead. Eat healthy meals, drink plenty of water, get adequate rest, and take care of your personal hygiene. Give yourself a break every once in awhile throughout the day to restore your natural state of harmony and calm and to rekindle your creativity. Structure your day to take advantage of your peak performance times.

5. Establish support networks.
Be willing to ask for help and receive it. Enlist family, friends, neighbors, professionals, and others to help you as needed.

6. Simplify your life.
Stop over-scheduling and over-committing. Begin eliminating things from your life that really aren't important to you. Being busy 24/7 doesn't mean that you are any more important than anyone else - it simply means that you are busy and probably missing out on the things that would really make you have more joy and fulfillment in your life. When your life is overcomplicated and overfull, there's little space for what truly matters. And there's no room for personal growth, positive energy, love, or even breathing at times.

Balance life can result from two actions. The first action is understanding and respecting each and every important aspect of your life. Changing your perspective in areas where you are stuck is the second.

Sunday, November 20, 2011

~ Wasted Time ~

Time is such a terrible thing to waste. We only get so much time to use each day and wasting even a few moments can keep us from being productive as possible. Each time we waste time, another moment to seize has slipped away that we will never get back. Think about that for a moment, there will never be another today. The date that slips by today will never come again. With that realization, should we not be making better use of our time?

All of this leads to an important question: how do people waste their time?

- People waste their time doing nothing :
There are many people who simply see their time slip away while they actually do absolutely nothing. One of the chronic nothing activities is sleeping late. Everyone does need sleep and maybe parents of newborn babies need even more. Getting enough sleep is essential for staying healthy, performing at peak levels and living a balanced life. However, there are some people who would sleep the day away without giving the matter much thought at all. Sleeping longer than you personally need is nothing but an absolute waste of time and time is precious.

- People waste their time doing things that do not matter :
Another area where people waste their time is doing things that do not matter. How much time is lost by people playing video games or other such mindless and meaningless activities? We are all guilty of rewarding ourselves with one game of Solitaire or Free Cell only to find we have wasted an hour playing the game. Video games offer nothing of value to the players or to anyone else for that matter. Find some more constructive use of time.

- People waste their time doing things they hate doing :
People also seem to habitually do things that they absolutely hate doing. This could be ongoing chores or even their job. While everyone needs a job and there are certain tasks that we have to do daily, there are some things to do to move beyond tasks that are disliked.

First, for chores that you dislike doing, find someone else who might be able to do the task for you. For example, mowing the lawn is a mindless task that must be done week in and week out. Paying a teenager to do the task might only cost a few bucks and frees up more of your valuable time. Second, for tasks at work, make sure to tackle those tasks first. The faster those tasks are faced and finished, the quicker a person can move on to better tasks.

- People waste their time talking instead of doing :
People talk a lot about things that they need or want to do but in the end never do anything. Take a few moments to stop talking about doing something and get after the task of getting it done. Talk accomplishes little or nothing until we are ready and willing to take action. Stop talking and start doing.

- People waste their time on selfishness :
People also waste a great deal of time on nothing but themselves. An excellent example is an addict. The addict focuses their efforts and time getting the item or thing they are craving. Some people are addicted to wasting time. They sleep late, they are never in a hurry to do anything worthwhile, and they are focused completely on their own personal wants and desires. These people rarely do anything for anyone else and waste their time.

Remember time is the fabric of life and when we waste time we are really just wasting our lives. Time is a gift that we are given with each new day. Twenty four brand new hours, 1440 priceless minutes and 86,400 seconds. All of this time will be spent but we chose the way that time is used. Are you investing your time or are you wasting your time?

Friday, November 11, 2011

~ Be Strong ~

Never think hard about past, It brings tears.
Don't think more about future, It brings fears.
Live this moment with a smile, It brings cheers..

Sunday, November 6, 2011

~ Searching .... Wondering ..... Surrender ...~

" Whoever does not find happiness in the remembrance of Allah, prayer, and reciting the Qur'an, will not find it anywhere else " -Hasan Al Basri(rahimuallah)....

I hold to these words tightly and keep in my heart. To help me grow and stay alive .....
For years ... I'm trying to figure out .. what is missing in my life ! ....
Marriage is not easy ... further more being a second wife ... you have to sacrifice in order to survive .. you have to swallow whatever comes your way, coz you are the second wife ... no power .. you got to take all the blames ... no matter what.....

The impact for being in these circumstances ... drives me crazy ... enough is enough ...
For years, I hide all these suffering from my family and friends ... showed them the fake smile ....
When everything comes to the surface ... everybody asks me .. Why do I stay ? .. What take you so long ? ..

As a muslim woman .. I place Allah above everything else ... whatever actions or every words that I speak ..... I gave a deep thoughts before I proceed ... I fear Allah more than anything else ! ... I want to be a good woman !...

People can say mean and harsh things .... and you can rise above the nastiness. When you feel as though you are the only candle in the wilderness and everyone is trying to blow out your flame, and the one person who should protect the flame is also trying to blow it out, you lose confidence....

I’m not angry anymore. I just simply don’t care. I love my children, and don’t want to lose them. But, I don’t care about this person to whom I am tied for the rest of my life...... when he walked out the door ... I realize ... its the end of my journey with him ....

Life must goes on ... I surrender to you Allah ...

Thursday, November 3, 2011

~ To All Lovers ~

Love isn’t a romantic comedy. It’s hard work, having faith through difficult times, and the ability to look at your partner and know they’ll be there through it all. Relationships are no longer 50/50. Each person needs to give 100 percent of themselves to make it work. It is not all give and it is not all take.

Communication is so very important; it links the hearts of two together, making them understand what each other means. Without communication there is no relationship; without respect there is no love; without trust there is no reason to continue. Marriage is not always easy! You need to work through your ups and downs, love one another no matter what, make alone time, and remember you promised to COMMIT yourself to each other in front of your friends and family and to God. Making a relationship work is just that: work.

It’s easy to love somebody when everything is wonderful. The proof of someone’s love is that they still love you when everything is awful.

Love doesn’t make a marriage; it leads to marriage. Struggles, obstacles, determination, commitment, and loyalty: THAT’S what makes a marriage.

If we weren’t happy, we should have told our partner. It would have been painful to hear, but would have been better than the lies and embarrassment.

To those who are still searching for your “true” love remember this: don’t go for looks, they can deceive. Don’t go for wealth, even that fades away. Find the one that makes your heart smile, because that will never go away.

Love is like a butterfly. If you chase it, it only eludes you. But if you are patient it will eventually come rest on your shoulder. I guess that is the beauty of love. Love happens when you least expect it too. So always expect the unexpected and when it finds you, grab hold of it with both hands. The minute you let go is the minute you may never see it again.

Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind and soul.

Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that

Monday, October 10, 2011

~ Sacrifice ~

When we think deeply about the problem of life, there is no path in the world, whether spiritual or material, which we can tread successfully without a sacrifice. Sometimes the sacrifice is great, and sometimes small; sometimes the sacrifice is made first, before achieving success, and sometimes afterwards.

As sacrifice is necessary in life, it is made by everyone in some form or other, but when it is made willingly, it turns into a virtue. The greater the ideal, the greater the sacrifice it demands, and if one studies wisely the process of advancement through life in any direction, one finds that it is nothing but a continual sacrifice.

Happiness comes from the understanding that this is the nature of life, and from not being hurt or troubled by it but knowing that it is by sacrifice, made until the end, that man attains to the desired goal.

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

~ Awareness ~

Awareness ..........

Awareness is noticing the blessings that often get overlooked in our busy lives.
Gratitude for a special blessing can inspire us look further and discover even more good in our lives.
As we are inspired, let us also be inspiring to others.’

If we tend to see today as the same as any other day then we have lost our sense of awareness.
Yes there is a lot of repetition from day to day in many of the things we do,
but the blessings that today will bring will never be the same as the ones we had yesterday and tomorrow is an entirely different story. Busy lives and heavy working schedules can often put on the blinkers and our awareness of these blessings.

Can we pause when a special moment happens?
Can we hold it?
Can we allow it to inspire us?
........that every inspiring moment has its roots in God.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

~ Anger ~

Anger .....

Anger is like flowing water; there's nothing wrong with it as long as you let it flow.
Hate is like stagnant water; anger that you denied yourself the freedom to feel, the freedom to flow; water that you gathered in one place and left to forget.

Stagnant water becomes dirty, stinky, disease-ridden, poisonous, deadly; that is your hate.
On flowing water travels little paper boats; paper boats of forgiveness.
Allow yourself to feel anger, allow your waters to flow, along with all the paper boats of forgiveness.

Be human.

Anger is an essential part of being human. People are taught to deny themselves anger, and in this, they are actually opening themselves up to hate. The more you deny yourself the freedom to be angry, the more you will hate.

Let yourself be angry, and hate will disintegrate, and when hate disintegrates, forgiveness prevails! The more you deny that you are angry, in attempts to be "holy" the more inhuman you will become, and the more inhuman you will become, the harder it will be to forgive.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

~ An Appointment ~

Carl Jung was a world famous psychologist who studied human behaviour at great length and shared many thoughts on why people do certain things. Many people made appointments to see him.

One day a wealthy lady phoned him to request an urgent appointment the next day at 3 pm. He said it wouldn’t be possible because he was committed to an important appointment at that time. The following day the same lady happened to be in a boat sailing past his garden which led down to the shore of the Lake of Zurich. There she could see him, sitting on a low wall with his shoes and socks off, dangling his feet in the water.

She was angry that he had lied to her and that he had no appointment at all. She arrived home and rang him straight away: “You said you couldn’t see me because you had a very important engagement. But I just saw you now doing nothing and sitting on the shore of the lake by yourself.”

He replied: “I told you no lie. I had an appointment. It has been the most important appointment of the week, an appointment with myself.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

~ Understanding ~

How many times have you tried to talk to someone about something that matters to you, tried to get them to see it the way you do?
And how many of those times have ended with you feeling bitter, resenting them for making you feel like your pain doesn't have any substance after all?

Like when you've split up with someone, and you try to communicate the way you feel, because you need to say the words, need to feel that somebody understands just how pissed off and frightened you feel.

The problem is, they never do. "Plenty more fish in the sea," they'll say, or "You're better off without them," or "Do you want some of these potato chips?" They never really understand, because they haven't been there, every day, every hour.

They don't know the way things have been, the way that it's made you, the way it has structured your world. They'll never realise that someone who makes you feel bad may be the person you need most in the world.

They don't understand the history, the background, don't know the pillars of memory that hold you up. Ultimately, they don't know you well enough, and they never can.

Everyone's alone in their world, because everybody's life is different. You can send people letters, and show them photos, but they can never come to visit where you live.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

~ Reality ~

People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all.
People talk about how great love is, but that’s bullshit.
Love hurts.
Feelings are disturbing.

People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous.
How can they deal with love if they’re afraid to feel?
Pain is meant to wake us up.
People try to hide their pain.
But they’re wrong.

Pain is something to carry
You feel your strength in the experience of pain.
It’s all in how you carry it.
That’s what matters.

Pain is a feeling.
Your feelings are a part of you.
Your own reality.

If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you’re letting society destroy your reality.
You should stand up for your right to feel your pain.

Jim Morrison

Sunday, September 11, 2011

~ Emotion ~

You think because he doesn't love you that you are worthless.
You think that because he doesn't want you anymore that he is right -- that his judgement and opinion of you are correct.
If he throws you out, then you are garbage. You think he belongs to you because you want to belong to him.

Don't. It's a bad word, 'belong.'
Especially when you put it with somebody you love.

Love shouldn't be like that.
Did you ever see the way the clouds love a mountain?
They circle all around it; sometimes you can't even see the mountain for the clouds.
But you know what?
You go up top and what do you see?
His head. The clouds never cover the head.
His head pokes through, because the clouds let him; they don't wrap him up.
They let him keep his head up high, free, with nothing to hide him or bind him.

You can't own a human being.
You can't lose what you don't own.
Suppose you did own him.
Could you really love somebody who was absolutely nobody without you?
You really want somebody like that?
Somebody who falls apart when you walk out the door?
You don't, do you? And neither does he.
You're turning over your whole life to him.
Your whole life, girl.
And if it means so little to you that you can just give it away, hand it to him, then why should it mean any more to him?

He can't value you more than you value yourself ......."

Toni Morrison

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

~ Excuses ~

Why Do We Make Excuses?

If you are someone who is a habitual excuse maker it might be a good idea to ask yourself why you deliberately choose to be less than truthful. Do you fear the scrutiny of friends, family, or coworkers? Are you uncomfortable with opening yourself up to others? Sometimes, making up a lame excuse to avoid attending a social event is done for self-preservation. Are you afraid your attendance would make you feel inadequate, vulnerable, or foolish?

Are your excuses meant to inflate your worthiness in the eyes of others? Ego does play a factor in habitual excuse making. However, indulging in ego-boosting through excuse making will likely have the reverse result: deflated personal self-worth. You can trick others into believing a lie, but convincing yourself is not as easy. Or is it? If you tell a lie convincingly enough and you get away with it you may also begin believing it yourself. It's true. Overtime, an excuse-maker will start buying into his own cons and, as a result, live a lie.

How Does it Feel Being Dishonest?

The reason why we make excuses is probably not as important as the "feeling" associated with being less than honest. Excuses are meant to hide our shortcomings or give a better light to our failures. Everyone gets that. We can all justify our reasons for making excuses. But, how does it feel having been deceitful? If it doesn't feel good, time to change your habit of making excuses. Also, if making excuses gives you a false sense of euphoria, that's not good either.

Stop Making Excuses.

Changing deceptive behaviors can be a little tricky for the chronic excuse maker. Twisting the truth becomes a way of life, almost an art form. Whenever excuses are found out to be erroneous, instead of giving a sincere apology for being untruthful the person will attempt to craft a creative non-apology (another excuse) that just adds to the original deception. This is called "digging yourself into a deeper hole."

Taking responsibility for your actions is the grown-up thing to do. Admitting your failures and accepting that you are not perfect may be hard to swallow at first. But, as you stop making excuses for yourself, you will soon realize how emotionally freeing your life can be. I know it is cliché - but "Honesty (really) is the best policy."

Monday, September 5, 2011

~ Solitude ~

  • All humans are frightened of their own solitude. But only in solitude can we learn to know ourselves, learn to handle our own eternal aloneness.-

  • Be able to be alone. Lose not the advantage of solitude, and the society of thyself.--Thomas Browne

  • Being solitary is being alone well: being alone luxuriously immersed in doings of your own choice, aware of the fullness of your won presence rather than of the absence of others. Because solitude is an achievement.--Alice Koller

  • Do not rely completely on any other human being, however dear. We meet all life's greatest tests alone.--Agnes Macphail

  • Each of us is alone in the world. It takes great courage to meet the full force of your aloneness. … When you face your aloneness, something begins to happen. Gradually, the sense of bleakness changes into a sense of true belonging. This is a slow and open-ended transition but it is utterly vital in order to come into rhythm with your own individuality. --John O'Donohue (Eternal Echoes: Celtic Reflections on Our Yearning to Belong)

  • I feel solitude as the blessing . It's the light of grace for me. I never close my door behind me without the awareness that I am carrying out an act of mercy toward myself.--Peter Hoeg (Smilla's Sense of Snow)

  • I learned...that inspiration does not come like a bolt, nor is it kinetic, energetic striving, but it comes into us slowly and quietly and all the time, though we must regularly and every day give it a little chance to start flowing, prime it with a little solitude and idleness.--Brenda Ueland

  • I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity.--Albert Einstein

  • I never found a companion that was so companionable as solitude.--Henry David Thoreau

  • If you're lonely when you're alone then you're in bad company.--Jean Paul Sartre

  • Inside myself is a place where I live all alone and that's where you renew your springs that never dry up.--Pearl S. Buck

  • Isolation is aloneness that feels forced upon you, like a punishment. Solitude is aloneness you choose and embrace. I think great things can come out of solitude, out of going to a place where all is quiet except the beating of your heart.--Jeanne Marie Laskas

  • It is in solitude that the works of hand, heart and mind are always conceived, and in solitude that individuality must be affirmed.--Robert Lindner (Must You Conform?)

  • It is not necessary that you leave the house. Remain at your table and listen. Do not even listen, only wait. Do not even wait, be wholly still and alone. The world will present itself to you for its unmasking . . . in ecstasy it will writhe at your feet.--Franz Kafka

  • It is well to be alone. It fertilizes the creative impulse.--Max Nordau

  • Language has created the word "loneliness" to express the pain of being alone, and the word "solitude" to express the glory of being alone.--Paul Johannes Tillich

  • Leisure is a form of silence, not noiselessness. It is the silence of contemplation such as occurs when we let our minds rest on a rosebud, a child at play, a Divine mystery, or a waterfall.--Bishop Fulton J. Sheen

  • Like water which can clearly mirror the sky and the trees only so long as its surface is undisturbed, the mind can only reflect the true image of the Self when it is tranquil and wholly relaxed.--Indra Devi

  • Man cannot survive without air, water and sleep. Next in importance comes food. And close on its heels, solitude.--Thomas Szasz

  • One must learn an inner solitude, where or with whomsoever he may be. He must learn to penetrate things and find God there, to get a strong impression of God firmly fixed on his mind.--Meister Eckhart

  • Only in quiet waters do thing mirror themselves undistorted. Only in a quiet mind is adequate perception of the world.--Hans Margolius

  • Only when one is connected to one's own core is one connected to others I am beginning to discover. And, for me, the core, the inner spring, can best be refound through solitude.--Anne Morrow Lindbergh (Gift from the Sea)

  • The person who has not learned to be happy and content while completely alone for an hour a day, or a week has missed life's greatest serenity.--H. Clay Tate (Building a Better Home Town)

  • Solitude can be frightening because it invites us to meet a stranger we think we may not want to know--ourselves.--Melvyn Kinder

  • Solitude can be used well by very few people. They who do must have a knowledge of the world to see the foolishness of it, and enough virtue to despise all the vanity.--Abraham Cowley

  • Solitude gives birth to the original in us.--Thomas Mann

  • Solitude is as needful to the imagination as society is wholesome for the character.--James Russell Lowell

  • ...solitude is such a potential thing. We hear voices in solitude, we never hear in the hurry and turmoil of life; we receive counsels and comforts, we get under no other condition...--Amelia Barr

  • Solitude is the salt of personhood. It brings out the authentic flavor of every experience.--May Sarton

  • Solitude, though it may be silent as light, is like light, the mightiest of agencies; for solitude is essential to man. All men come into this world alone; all leave it alone.--Thomas De Quincey

  • There are days when solitude is a heady wine that intoxicates you with freedom, others when it is a bitter tonic, and still others when it is a poison that makes you beat your head against the wall.--Sidonie Gabrielle Colette (Earthly Paradise)

  • To sit alone in the lamplight with a book spread out before you, and hold intimate converse with men of unseen generations--such is a pleasure beyond compare.--Kenko Yoshida

  • Solitude, if rightly used, becomes not only a privilege but a necessity. Only a superficial soul fears to fraternize with itself.--Alice H. Rice

  • Solitude is a necessary protest to the incursions and the false alarms of society's hysteria, a period of cure and recovery.--Abraham Joshua Heschel

  • Solitude is strength; to depend on the presence of the crowd is weakness. The man who needs a mob to nerve him is much more alone than he imagines.--Paul Brunton

  • Solitude is the human condition in which I keep myself company. Loneliness comes about when I am alone without being able to split up into the two-in-one, without being able to keep myself company.--Hannah Arendt

  • Solitude is the place of purification.--Martin Buber (I and Thou, 3)

  • Talents are best nurtured in solitude: character is best formed in the stormy billows of the world.--Goethe

  • There is a solitude which each and every one of us has always carried within. More inaccessible than the ice cold mountains, more profound than the midnight sea: the solitude of self.--Elizabeth Cady Stanton

  • The thoughtful soul to solitude retires.--Omar Khayyam

  • True silence is the rest of the mind, and is to the spirit what sleep is to the body, nourishment and refreshment.--William Penn

  • We need society, and we need solitude also, as we need summer and winter, day and night, exercise and rest.--Philip Gilbert Hamerton (The Intellectual Life)

  • We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature--trees, flowers, grass--grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence...we need silence to be able to touch souls.--Mother Teresa

  • What a commentary on our civilization when being alone is considered suspect, when one has to apologize for it, make excuses, hide the fact that one practices it-like a secret vice!--Anne Morrow Lindbergh

  • What a lovely surprise to discover how unlonely being alone can be.--Ellen Burstyn

  • When we are alone on a starlit night, when by chance we see the migrating birds in autumn descending on a grove of junipers to rest and eat; when we see children in a moment when they are really children, when we know love in our own hearts; or when, like the Japanese poet, Basho, we hear an old frog land in a quiet pond with a solitary splash--at such times the awakening, the turning inside out of all values, the "newness", the emptiness and the purity of vision that make themselves evident, all these provide a glimpse of the cosmic dance.--Thomas Merton

  • When we cannot bear to be alone, it means we do not properly value the only companion we will have from birth to death--ourselves.--Eda LeShan

  • Women need real moments of solitude and self-reflection to balance out how much of ourselves we give away.--Barbara De Angelis

  • You cannot be lonely if you like the person you're alone with.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

~ The Gifts ~

(this is where I found the fish)

21st August 2011 .....

" Umi ... come quickly " fatin, my third daughter shouted from downstairs as she opened the front door.
" What !!! " I shouted back at her, while running down the stairs.
" Look ! " She pointed at something black infront her car.

It's a fish just infront her car. Wondering from where this fish come from. Its heavy rain last night, but nobody here got fish pond , no river nearby also. So where on earth this fish come from.

I called my relative asking what should I do with this fish. All telling me to keep this fish.
Hmmmm ... I have no other option than to keep it.

Further more they said it is ramadhan the blessed month .. so maybe there is something Allah wants to show me .

22nd August 2011 .........

(Puteri Arsyhia Adnie At-Terawis)

That afternoon ........Nabila my eldest daughter called me ... complaining labor pain . I tried to calm her and asked to do some wirid . I urge my son-inlaw to take her to hospital qucikly. I can't accompany her as I stayed quite far and have to wait for Fatin to come back.

A few minutes before 7.00 pm .... got a message from my son-inlaw he got a baby girl .... Alhamdulilah .....

Saturday, August 20, 2011

~ Reflection ~

Reflection .........

When we retire at night, we constructively review our day.
Were we resentful, selfish, dishonest or afraid?
Do we owe an apology?
Have we kept something to ourselves which should be discussed with another person at once? Were we kind and loving toward all?
What could we have done better?
Were we thinking of ourselves most of the time?
Or were we thinking of what we could do for others, of what we could pack into the stream of life?

But we must be careful not to drift into worry, remorse or morbid reflection, for that would diminish our usefulness to others. After making our review we ask Allah’s forgiveness and inquire what corrective measures should be taken.

On awakening let us think about the twenty-four hours ahead. We consider our plans for the day. Before we begin, we ask Allah to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives. Under these conditions we can employ our mental faculties with assurance, for after all Allah gave us brains to use. Our thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives.

In thinking about our day we may face indecision. We may not be able to determine which course to take. Here we ask Allah for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. We relax and take it easy. We don’t struggle. We are often surprised how the right answers come after we have tried this for a while. What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind. Being still inexperienced and having just made conscious contact with Allah, it is not probable that we are going to be inspired at all times.

We might pay for this presumption in all sorts of absurd actions and ideas. Nevertheless, we find that our thinking will, as time passes, be more and more on the plane of inspiration. We come to rely upon it.
We usually conclude the period of meditation with a prayer that we be shown all through the day what our next step is to be, that we be given whatever we need to take care of such problems. We ask especially for freedom from self-will, and are careful to make no request for ourselves only. We may ask for ourselves, however, if others will be helped. We are careful never to pray for our own selfish ends. Many of us have wasted a lot of time doing that and it doesn’t work. You can easily see why.

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

~ Burden ~

Knowledge is a burden ...if it robs you of innocence.
Knowledge is a burden ...if it is not integrated into life.

Knowledge is a burden ...if it doesn't bring joy.

Knowledge is a burden... if it gives you an idea that you are wise.
Knowledge is a burden... if it doesn't set you free.
Knowledge is a burden... if it makes you feel you are special.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

~ A Slice of Life ~

Life is too short . Most of us look to live past our seventies and perhaps well into our eighties and nineties. However, there are no guarantees in life. We must all learn to live life now while we can, because our lives can be gone in just a blink of an eye.

Life is less about finding answers than it is about seeking them.

An ideal life is not a steady, consistent progression. It involves 2 steps forward and anywhere from 1 to 3 steps back. It involves peaks and valleys. The peaks feed your soul and fuel your strength to endure the valleys. The valleys feed your heart and build your wisdom to appreciate the peaks.

Whatever ideal life I can envision with clarity will always remain elusive. The true ideal is one I cannot see. It will only be revealed to me in time, and it will only be revealed if I keep my eyes and my heart open enough to see it.

The only certainty in life is that it will be fraught with uncertainty.

Promises are not guarantees, and even guarantees can be voided by the uncertainties of life. Each promise that is fulfilled should be recognized for the gift it truly is.

If I limit my expectations to the unexpected, I will never regret what never comes to be.

I thrive on stories and dreams, the greatest of which highlight compassion, understanding and brotherhood, and serve as reminders that love and faith really can conquer all.

Life really is a walk in the least, that's where the filter is, the one that sorts fiction from truth and helps me to see who's really behind the curtain.

Love is not a guarantees towards happiness. Love comes and goes unexpectedly. It will fade due to certain circumstances. Don't place high hope on love. It will leave you broken hearted.

Our kids were an asset. Take good care of them. They are truly a gift from Allah, love them and Insyallah they will love you back.

A bad marriages gave a great impact on life. The experiences make you more careful in making decision and make you more wiser in every steps that we make.

Many of us go through life thinking that tomorrow is just another day. We think that we can always see family and friends another time. We put off things until tomorrow. Perhaps we all need to celebrate life now and cherish the good times while we can.

Time waits for no one and you can’t put time in the bank. Perhaps we need to get out and “Live. Love, Laugh” a little more and get on with life. The slice of life may be big or small but we need to “Live to our full potential and not waste it."

Monday, July 25, 2011

~ Lessons Life Taught Me ~

1. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
2. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
3. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch

4. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
5. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
6. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

7. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
8. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
9. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

10. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
11. Everything can change in the blink of an eye.
12. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

13. Get rid of anything that isn't useful.
14. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
15. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

16. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
17. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
18. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

19. The most important sex organ is the brain.
20. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
21. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'

22. Always choose life.
23. Forgive everyone everything.
24. What other people think of you is none of your business.

25. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
26. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
27. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

28. Believe in miracles.
29. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
30. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

31. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
32. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's,
we'd grab ours back.
33. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

34. The best is yet to come.
35. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
36. Yield.
38. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

Saturday, July 23, 2011

~ Persistence ~

Is it time for you to give up and quit?

Most meaningful endeavors in life come with challenges. Marriages, businesses, getting an education, raising children and self-improvement are all things that are important, but aren’t always easy.

Giving up is an option. I know I’ve considered quitting just about everything I’ve ever started at one point or another. Surrendering to the challenges sure seems tempting sometimes.

Of course, successful people will tell you that persistence is the key to winning. Giving up is the only sure way to failure.

Persistence is defined as the ability to continue firmly in your purpose, despite the opposition you are feeling. It takes courage and backbone to be persistent.

When I feel like giving up, I look at these 5 rules to motivate me to be more persistent :

1. Breakthroughs happen everyday ;

" When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hang on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn. "
~ Harriet Beecher Stowe

It does seem to me that breakthroughs occur just after the darkest period in any endeavor. Of course, giving up is certain failure. Stick it out one more day. Don’t look out too far toward the horizon, but instead ask yourself, “What will it take to make it through today?” Who knows what tomorrow might bring?

2. Surge to the finish line ;

" Nothing could be worse than the fear that one had given up too soon, and left one unexpended effort that might have saved the world. "
~ Jane Addams

I think those that succeed have the uncanny ability to summon their second wind when things seem their bleakest. Maybe it is the eternal optimism they hold inside. Maybe it is undying confidence. Maybe it is a fear of failure. Whatever the case, dig deep for another push toward your goal and you might just win big!

3. The moment is yours ;

" If you have made mistakes, there is always another chance for you. You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call “failure” is not the falling down, but the staying down. "
~ Mary Pickford

Face every day as if it is a new day. It is another chance to go out and make happen what you want to happen. I know this is true because I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life. If there was no such thing as a second chance, then I’d be homeless, lonely and destitute! Embrace your opportunity to start fresh this moment.

4. Adopt a survivor mentality ;

" Sometimes your greatest asset is simply your ability to stay with it longer than anyone else. "
~ Brian Tracy

Make the other guy give up! You aren’t going to be the one to give in first are you? Usually the person that sticks to their guns the longest will be the ultimate victor. Remember the motto from the television show Survivor? It is time for you to “Outwit, Outlast and Outplay” your opposition!

5. Never forget the tortoise ;

" It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop."
~ Confucius

Remember the tortoise from The Tortoise and the Hare? He was painfully slow, but he never quit and he ended up winning. Sometimes we can get discouraged because things aren’t moving as fast as we want. In this case, our expectations become self-defeating. Don’t worry about how slow things are going, just be sure they keep moving!